Heavenly Father gives me Peace!

Ok so I finally quit procrastinating and made the appointment to see Dr Tormey.  Feeling a little insecure because I wasn't sure I physically felt anything but I needed to convince her it was there.  So here we go she does a little breast exam and everything seems the same as the last time we visited she looks at my mamogram from a few months ago, all is well! So what are you here for? Well I'm feeling something right here and I wanted your opinion. Ok, I just don't seem to feel anything the cyct is still right here but nothing else, I take her finger four or five times and place it where I think this is at and she says ,"nothing there", lets take a look with the ultrasound just to be sure.  You guessed, "nothing there".  Me,being petrified to have this cyst drained, decided well ok were done then, but my mouth just said," then I guess we had better drain that cyst so the visit wasn't a waste of time."  Oh I wish I hadn't said that because I was truly afraid of the pain. Dr T says this is so quick I'm not even going to numb you because the sting of the numbing shot is worse than the draining. Ok lets go! She put this very long needle into the side of my left breast, not great not aweful, then she starts fishing around and moving this needle deeper and deeper and just all over the place. She says darn thing it just won't hold still it move away from me everytime I get near it, she states that this is very odd to have happen.  So I quietly said is there a chance we could you the numbing shot before you go back in that was quit painful, thank goodness she agreed! Finally numb, thank goodness for that miracle drug, she gets the cyst drained, YES, I am ecstatic, then I hear her say oh theres another little one hiding underneath that cyst, I'm going to drain it while were here, ok? Ok go for it I'm still numb. Well she says nothing will come out of it so again we start jamming this needle all over the place again. Dr T is ultrasounding at the same time and she not liking the looks of this thing nor the fact that nothing will drain.  She can tell the left breast has about all it can take for a day and says we need to biopsy this I'm really not comfortable with what is going on. I'm thinking oh no big deal Peggy had a biopsy, my mom did all was well no big deal!

The biopsy was scheduled so Michelle could go with me she has worked with Dr T in the past and just wanted to be there, I'm glad she was.  Dr T did the biopsy and it was evident just looking at Michelle all was not well by what they were seeing.  Dr T finally said ok we'll send that to the lab but were going to go ahead and schedule surgery right now because I'm 99% sure thats cancer.  Michelle was very upset, I was doing ok, but was feeling like this must be more serious than I realize because Michelle is not well!  Sure enough 2 days later, Michelle had gone back to Texas, the results were in. Possibly Stage 2 Breast Cancer ER/PR negative with the HER2NEW being positive!Wow! I'm still pretty calm Heavenly Father is aware of me and this will be fine!! Two days earlier I had been called to be the new Primary President in our new ward and I was ecstatic, before Bishop left that night he said "Sis DeMille is there anything that would keep you from fulfilling this calling at this time?" I thought it sounded odd I said no my children all help eachother and I only work 2 days a week this is a great time in my life. Well I'm not sure maybe he had a little clue was headed my way  very quickly.  So the day I was supposed to give him counselor names I instead gave hime my news of breast cancer.  He sent over the first counselor in the Bishopric, Bro Haslem, who happens to be one of the best Oncologists in St George, what a blessing, he spent hours explaining the situatio to us and also felt that with whats ahead we should wait on the calling, that was extremely difficult for me to understand. But I have been given peace and assured I will have his opportunity in my future.